


[kappa.png]

by Anonymous



Category: Pocket Monsters: Sword & Shield | Pokemon Sword & Shield Versions
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Chatting & Messaging, Gen, Post-Canon, Texting, actually a pain to do all the code tags, rated for language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-22
Updated: 2020-04-22
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:33:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23763148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: #conference-room-8[20:31] HammerlockeAS;DLFJASLDFK[20:40] hippity-hoppityis anyone in this chat okay?[20:42] Hulburyno.
Relationships: Kibana | Raihan & Nezu | Piers, Mary | Marnie & Nezu | Piers, Rurina | Nessa & Yarrow | Milo
Kudos: 9
Collections: Anonymous





	[kappa.png]

**Author's Note:**

> im a mess and only vaguely know how css works. it took me like 10 mins to find out that [bulbapedia](https://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Category:Type_color_templates) has a page for hex codes. 
> 
> this is an embodiment of my mess so characters may be ooc. format is modelled after discord. idk if it's hard for read. for me is fine. testing the waters, so to speak.

_Definitely Not Galar League_

#conference-room-8  
[19:36] Hammerlocke has added **hippity-hoppity** , **rosemarnie** , **glory** , **victory** , and **get beat**! 

[19:38] Hammerlocke  
alrgiht who the fUCK changed the names  
i was fine w asseater cause thats hwat we do

[19:40] Hulbury  
probably kabu b/c u mentioned adding the kids  
need to keep this pg 13ish  
or just not rated x considering there’s both u and piers

[19:41] Spikemuth  
Dont loop me in with that wanker

[19:42] Hammerlocke  
luv u 2 piers

[19:42] Spikemuth  
Gross

[19:42] Hammerlocke  
D:

[19:45] glory  
wat.

[19:46] Hulbury  
don’t worry about it champ

[19:46] glory  
monkaS

[20:00] Motostoke  
Welcome to the group chat.  
And yes, I changed the names, Raihan.

[20:02] Hammerlocke  
cool cool  
we ll let the kiddies have their innocence 4 now

[20:05] Motostoke  
For now?

[20:05] Hammerlocke  
dw abt it

[20:10] get beat  
“Kiddies”? I’m sixteen

[20:12] Hammerlocke  
pshh thats baby age

[20:13] Motostoke  
What were you doing at 16 that was age-appropriate, Raihan?

[20:14] Spikemuth  
Throwing tantrums

[20:14] Hammerlocke  
stfu piers  
i c wat u mean now kabu

[20:19] Spikemuth  
Right, mr youngest gym leader

[20:19] Hammerlocke  
once again  
sht the fuck up piers  
no one asked dor ur commentayr 

[20:20] Spikemuth  
u cant make me

[20:25] Hammerlocke  
i know wehre u live n i will come beat ur skinny ass

[20:25] Spikemuth  
Ive got more ass than u  
u long-legged fuck

[20:26] Turffield  
There goes the chastity in this chat….

[20:26] Leon  
Chastity?

[20:26] Spikemuth  
No.

[20:26] Hammerlocke  
leonn nooo

[20:27] Leon  
You mean chatsity!

[20:27] Hulbury  
milo what did you do

[20:27] Hammerlocke  
yeH milo  
smh  
it weas 3 daus wo a pun frim leo n  
a new recoord  
nd u haad to break it

[20:28] Turffield  
I’m sorry  
But you and Piers tainted the chat first

[20:28] Hulbury  
as much as i hate to admit it  
he’s got a point

[20:29] Hammerlocke  
fuk u  
did leon just come in 2 say tat

[20:30] Spikemuth  
Probably

[20:30] Hammerlocke  
forget piers ima go beat up leon

[20:30] Spikemuth  
Only way u r gonna get that ass

[20:30] Hammerlocke  
for the last fuckin time  
SHUT THE FUCK UP PIERS

[20:30] Spikemuth  
No.

[20:31] Hammerlocke  
AS;DLFJASLDFK

[20:40] hippity-hoppity  
is anyone in this chat okay?

[20:42] Hulbury  
no.

[20:45] glory  
sam  
e

[20:47] Hulbury  
and you’re what? 14? 15?  
not judging  
i had my existential crisis around that age too

[20:47] glory  
ayyy

[20:47] Hulbury  
dw we all support the lot of you  
despite what raihan and piers may lead you to believe

[20:48] hippity-hoppity  
thaks nessa :D

[20:48] Hulbury  
np

[20:59] Hammerlocke  
OPE N TEH DOOR PIERS

[21:00] Hulbury  
speaking of  
here we have incident number who knows  
@RotomBot log this please

[21:00] Spikemuth  
Fuck is that u

[21:00] RotomBot  
Incident #317 of @Hammerlocke and @Spikemuth is currently being recorded!

[21:01] glory  
oh shit  
317?  
how do u get anytingd one

[21:01] Hammerlocke  
IDK IS IT

[21:01] Spikemuth  
GET THE BLOODY FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE

[21:01] Hulbury  
we don’t

[21:01] Hammerlocke  
did you forget you gave me a key?

[21:02] Hulbury  
it’s why we text the important stuff

[21:02] glory  
o

[21:02] Spikemuth  
YOU STOLE MINE THEN MADE A COPY YOU WANKER

[21:02] Hammerlocke  
n u never changed the lock  
<3 u 2 piers

[21:02] Spikemuth  
GRSOJDOSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

[21:05] get beat  
Seriously, how are you functioning adults?

[20:06] Hulbury  
the thing is, kid  
they really aren’t  
like i said before  
no one is okay in this chat  
idk how they’re still alive

[20:33] Turffield  
Wait, Piers, are you okay?

[20:45] Turffield  
Did Raihan actually murder you?

[20:45] glory  
strangled via inteleon leggs  
rest in peac e  
u were fun to battle emo bro

[20:46] Hulbury  
those aren’t some bad legs tho  
to be strangled by

[20:48] Turffield  
NESSA 

[20:48] Hulbury  
what  
i can appreciate my mates’ legs if i wanna  
he got them nice leggg

[20:48] glory  
tru dat

[20:50] Turffield  
…

[20:50] Circhester  
and i’m out again  
i don’t know you people  
goodbye

[20:50] Hulbury  
see you, luv  
wait if gordie’s circhester then what’s melony’s name

[20:51] Turffield  
Who else is “Ice Type Gym”?

[20:51] Hulbury  
oh shit didn’t see that

[20:54] Turffield  
Is Piers still alive, though?  
I’m kinda worried, ngl

[20:54] Hulbury  
¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

[21:15] Spikemuth  
I’m fine  
Thanks Milo

[21:16] Turffield  
Just glad that you’re okay :)  
I am curious as to what happened, though

[21:16] Spikemuth  
raihan broke into my house and started suffocating me  
It was horrible.

[21:16] Turffield  
Sorry to hear that

[21:16] Hammerlocke  
i didnt fuckin suffocaet u i was tickling u  
wanker  
dont slander my name

[21:17] Spikemuth  
u already do enough of that urself  
Anyways go get me food

[21:17] Hammerlocke  
get it urself fuckfac  
e

[21:17] Spikemuth  
u were the one who bruised my tailbone  
i want pizza

[21:18] Turffield  
Are you still at his place, Raihan?  
I’d have thought that Piers would ahve kicked you out by now  
have*

[21:18] Hammerlocke  
ye  
hes a baby n doesnt wanna move

[21:18] Truffield  
Alright  
Time for me to go, have a good night guys!

[21:18] Spikemuth  
exCUSE me i have a bruised tailbone and it hurts when i stand up  
And i am letting you stay out of teh goodness of my heart so appreciate it and get me a pizza  
See u Milo

[21:19] Hammerlocke  
u 2 milo

[21:19] rosemarnie  
what heart

[21:19] Hammerlocke  
wat heart

[21:19] Spikemuth  
Shut up  
Wait raihan u added Marnie?  
When.

[21:19] Hammerlocke  
ayo marnie wat up  
ye lol  
scroll up bitch

[21:20] Spikemuth  
Get me my fucking pizza whore

[21:20] Circhester  
that’s gay

[21:20] Hammerlocke  
OW THAT HURT  
I AMM YES GORIDE THANKS FOR NOTICING  
ATOP FUCKING KICKING ME PEIRSSS

[21:22] Circhester  
why you texting when you’re in the same room btw

[21:22] Hammerlocke  
words 2 hard rn  
i got hawaiian bc ur a bully

[21:22] Spikemuth  
THATS GROSS

[21:22] Circhester  
smh

[21:22] rosemarnie  
can i have some

[21:22] Hammerlocke  
sure drop by piers s in 5

[21:23] Spikemuth  
Isn’t delivery usually 15mins  
Wait where is my sweet Marnie who didn’t eat hawaiian pizza  
WHY DID U CORRUPT HER RAIHA N

[21:23] Hammerlocke  
bc u have shit taste  
hawaiian is a perfect blend of savoury and sweet  
u can have the biggest slice marns

[21:25] rosemarnie  
kthx uncle

[21:25] Hammerlocke  
np kid

[21:25] Spikemuth  
Aw that’s sweet  
If you weren’t conspiring behind my back.

[21:25] rosemarnie  
but i like hawaiian  
even before raihan ordered it while we were playing games til midnight

[21:27] Spikemuth  
Raihan.

[21:27] Hammerlocke  
thx kid  
just wat i needed

[21:27] rosemarnie  
:*

[21:31] Hammerlocke  
piers if i gave u cheese pizza would u forgive me  
pls dont break down the bathroom door  
this isnt even my house

[21:32] Spikemuth  
How Much.

[21:32] Hammerlocke  
theres a box on teh counter

[21:43] Hammerlocke  
ok dont tell piers but he screamed like a little bitch and i got it recorded  
[babyrage.mp4]

[21:43] Hulbury  
you know he can see this right

[21:43] Hammerlocke  
yea which is why i left bye!@!!!

[21:44] glory  
butt di d u act give him tht cheese pizza tho  
if u didnt i wld act come to beat ur ass

[21:44] rosemarnie  
yep but it's covered in pineapples

[21:44] glory  
LMAO  
was it u??

[21:44] rosemarnie  
maybe :^)

[21:44] glory  
xdxd

[21:45] Hulbury  
@Motostroke i don’t think these kids ever had any innocence

[21:45] Spikemuth  
MY PIZZA HAS BEEN TAITNNED  
GET YOUR ASS BSCK HERE RAIAHN

[21:45] Motostoke  
At least they're not as depraved…. 

[21:45] Hammerlocke  
SHUT UR FUCKING RETIRED ASS UP

[21:46] Motostoke  
Also, I changed the names before Piers and Opal announced their retirement. Apologies to you both, and your successors.  
Now, I see that the previous and current leaders of prestigious gyms are continuing to act like children.  
We can remove Piers so that one of Raihan's victims is saved and we deal with less of…that. Marnie is already shaping to be quite competent as a Gym Leader as well.  
We should also replace Raihan while we're at it. Hop? Would you like to become Hammerlocke's gym leader?

[21:51] hippity-hoppity  
sry mr kabu but im happy w/ research :D

[21:53] Motostoke  
Hm, unfortunate.

[21:53] Hulbury  
maybe we can get leon  
going from an attention whore to a professional

[21:54] Motostoke  
That is an idea.  
He also has two dragons on his team. A good head start.

[21:55] Hammerlocke  
pls dont talk like im not here  
u can rip my dragons from my cold dead hands

[21:55] Hulbury  
wow  
proper spelling

[21:55] Hammerlocke  
hm  
who goes 2 who 4 gay panic

[21:56] Hulbury  
you can kiss my ass

[21:56] Hammerlocke  
:P

[21:56] glory  
i knew it  
nessas gay  
@victory u owe me 50$

[21:57] Hulbury  
i don’t know if i should be flattered or not

[21:57] Hammerlocke  
at least ur worth moneu  
thes kids bet a plate od chips on me  
y even when u alrd know im gay

[21:57] glory  
bcc ur face was priceles  
[ladyraihan.jpeg]

[21:57] Hammerlocke  
DHDKSKBFJ

[21:58] Hulbury  
LMAO

[21:58] glory  
ikr  
this is y u shld b a phtographr @victory

[21:58] victory  
IDK, I still haven’t decided yet  
Also, no I don’t!!  
Stop telling people I owe you money

[21:59] rosemarnie  
i’d pay money for that tho

[22:00] Spikemuth  
Saved to my blackmail folder thanks

[22:00] Hulbury  
ugh that  
how much do you have saved in there again

[22:01] Spikemuth  
A lot  
But not just raihan  
Im not a creep

[22:01] Hulbury  
sure jan

[22:01] glory  
ko’d  
i seee u nessa bringin back the old memes  
poggers 

[22:02] Hulbury  
you know it  
anyways, i need to go because i’ve an early meeting tomorrow  
goodnight

[22:02] glory  
oof gn  
glhf

[00:00] RotomBot  
Incident #317 has been successfully recorded!

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for the read :*  
>  ~~does anyone like timestamps?? bc i find it funny smtimes. if not i'll just use tilde~ to signify time~~


End file.
